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Greensmere LoGo

Notables

  • Nobody was ten holed in this shotgun event.
  • The course rating - I have never seen it before BUT five of the group sheets came in with a TEN rating (please remember to fill out this part of the sheet).
  • The event had snow, was cancelled, {and in the 14 minutes before ClubEG did their magic}, caused panic, then was rescheduled. We had the two different parades to the course {I wish we had a video of the cars pulling into Greensmere at 10:45}. Bubba stayed behind to inform those that missed the original message. Big THANK YOU to the BIG GUY BUBBA!
  • On August 9, 2006 Rulz, RipZone and Smitty (in only his 13th event) all welcomed Chef to the Tour – right here at Greensmere. Ripper was the only one gracious enough to allow Chef the win. Today he played his 300th event – the day after Smitty, which was a week after ProZee (they were 15, 16, & 17th to do so). Nobody allowed Chef a win today.
  • Bookie was awarded his 500 event watch
  • Fingz was mentioned for having played his 54th event {2nd most by a rookie} on only his 94th day.
  • Juice set a new record for dogs (52), Iron Maiden for events (117), wins (225), & points (465), and McGoop for eagles (8), birds (202), and skins (125). Oh yes and that small total of 2225 bones.
  • This weekend we had five star events. All five stars today win a Slammer Gear gift certificate! Today’s fourth star went out to the new D Champion. Today he shot like a B, except for those few times, that he proved why he was in the D final. He entered the event with a collective 9-4-1 record. Now add three more wins. FELICITATIONS oiseau en colčre.
  • The fifth star is the only star that didn’t win a championship. He DID compete for one, went home with the most bones for his two dogs. He ended the season the way that he started his Slammer career ‘câini de vân?toare’. He went undefeated, by the way, against a foursome that he had the worst odds of succeeding against (32%). Being told that he won the most bones he offered to buy a par for 100 bones, on any of the last three holes.
  • Reminder folks - that today, when we were discussing the lift, clean, and place rules, our own Rulz asked a question. It didn’t matter for today, however, when we play LC&P in our own fairway it DOES NOT include the fringe / apron / collar. Thank you for asking!
  • NOTABLE ONE - open division (started on hole 8) - You have already read that Chef won zero matches, and Malone ends up as third ranked. Number two is Woodsy, and some guy named McGoop is the Open Champ and Combat Cup winner. Medians as of today are 73-77-78-79
  • NOTABLE TWO - A division (hole 2 start) - Sunny came in and defended three times. He was down two to Crenshaw with four to play. He was dormy with Dracula at that same time. A birdie and three pars was good enough for two ties and make him the champ. Know what else? Do you understand how the scoring median works? Well our A champ dropped into the B today, with this event. Today's medians are 85-84-84-84
  • NOTABLE THREE - Ladies A - congrats LilMuffin for beating Bam Bam!
  • NOTABLE FOUR - B division - they came in as Juice, chill, FingZ & JMoney, started on hole 9 and check out the third star.” Their medians? 85-86-87-88
  • NOTABLE FIVE - senior division (hole 5)- may be the best example of our Jenga theme. See the second star note on the right. The worst thing about the presentation was when our Videographer Ticklar yelled “Go LEAFS Go!’ the only division without close medians - but remember we had to sub in some late replacements.
  • NOTABLE SIX - junior division - Did ShteemeBoy intimidate the other Juniors? felicitations!
  • NOTABLE SEVEN - ladies B division (hole one) - Scores don’t matter in match play. but here are numbers to be aware of. 2-0 is her record. How about par-par-par-bird-par-par-par-par- bogey for an even par front nine. Congratulations Dr.Pepper - you are part of the family now - change the license plates on the truck. 85-86-89!
  • NOTABLE EIGHT - C division (hole 7) - lots of notes in the first star section - this group led the day in quotables. (92-92-93-94)
  • NOTABLE NINE - ladies C division - started on hole 10. No strangers here, these Slammettes played together (Pearls & Lulu) in the Ottawa Sun Scramble. Sunshine went to Europe for many weeks during the summer - so she and Pearls played a mock TC match in case they were to meet before SunShine’s return. Our champion is Pearls - she joins McGoop, as the only two to be champ - two years in a row. Pearls changed from D division last year to this Ladies C. 96-100-104!
  • NOTABLE TEN - D division (hole 4) - What is match play for a championship all about - to win you have to play well. All four finalists had a better than D score. Today’s 4th star Angry Bird is the victor...100-101-101-104 are their medians.
  • NOTABLE ELEVEN - super senior division - hole 3 start. Both tried to give the match away. Finally Potter won it and the old guys could have stopped at 18 instead of walking away. medians are 92 & 100 (but this median is 94 over last ten)
  • LAST NOTABLEs - Note to my fellow OCs. When you are in charge of hole selection, know the course and DON’T start furthest away = longest walk back at end.
  • Finally in our Jenga game - we didn’t collapse! This team with their supporting cast makes Club EG leaps and bounds ahead of the rest of the world!

Quotables

  • The very first quotable actually happened before the event. The last one happened with chill in the hospital, hours after everyone else had gone home and fallen asleep. We may call the event "chill had a spill!" ... "It goes without saying but I am saying it anyways – we all wish our sister chill a speedy recovery, a restful convalescence, effective but not too gruelling physio and a Slammericious week in Cuba."
  • “Can't call anybody except Rulz and Malone genius. So much hype for the hypothermic race for the golden parka. Surprised newspapers aren't covering this.”
  • “I have to thank my sponsors Sunny & Dracula for playing in such a way to get me into this event.”
  • 9:45 AM from Gator – first at the course “Fairways you can see grass. But greens are white! I should win just for showing up. (see the first star note)
  • “Hey Chef – too bad – your 300th event will have to wait for next year.” A half hour later “Today is Chef’s 300th event.”
  • “Are you omni-present?”
  • “Thank you for having us.”
  • “You have the wrong soft drink name. You should be grape crush!”
  • Famous last words, “I’m going to kick your ass!”
  • “Hey Bubba, are you trying to sneak up on the hole?”
  • “Wow! These greens are awesome! Nice putt Chef! Nice putt Chef! Nice putt Chef!”
  • “Stop talking behind my back, in front of me!”
  • “Bookie is a cheater! (editor’s note - you had to be there, because we ALL KNOW that is bogus)”
  • “Stevie is on a snap-watch.”
  • “I’m not man enough…”
  • “Everybody do the FingZ!”
  • during presentation, “How did he know that?"
  • “Bookie looks like a conehead”
  • “I think that pointZero is the nicest guy on the Tour”, by the same guy that said “My mother (back in New Delhi), would never believe me, that I'm golfing in the snow. She’d think that I am lying.”
  • “Tesla that doggie is worth 53 bones.” “ Twelve pesos in Cuba , buy me a beer!”
  • “If this cart is a rockin - then don’t bother knockin!”
  • "There was a story about a brave lass named chill. She slayed dragons, won the day, but was struck down by the dreaded snowy grass."
  • In case you missed it the first time ... "It goes without saying but I am saying it anyways – we all wish our sister chill a speedy recovery, a restful convalescence, effective but not too gruelling physio and a Slammericious week in Cuba." This just in at 9:30 Tuesday morning "I had the surgery last night. Went very well." from the patient herself
 Event: Greensmere
Sun Nov 16, 2014
Summary
When was the last time that you played Jenga. Don't know it? - look it up. This finale was so much like a game of Jenga. The juggling for the positions and the juxtapositions - the inski / bailing .... the weather, the moving of the event {as a couple of other Nov. events}, the closing due to too much snow - the parade of vehicles to Greensmere. The two no-shows - more juggling then off to a very successful event. The one cloud - our little sister chill was injured. Go read the third star update and one quotable. There he was! Dale Trafford, sitting at his post (@ Canadian) and having to make a decision. Cancel a Slammer Tour event. He is a great partner to the Tour and didn’t want to do it. We looked at the radar – we saw the greens from every angle. He in fact went out to the practise area [and go read that 4th quotable], and explained to me the risks. The event HAD to be cancelled. I know it is hard for anyone that arrived at Greensmere, to believe the difference between the two locations. Just ask one of the Slammers that saw both. How great were hosts Debra Griffith, Tyler MacEachern, and Nathan Griffith? What about the cook – he stayed, he cooked anything and everything asked of him, doled out the beers and wines (but had NO SCOTCH!) – and ALSO controlled other things when he appeared too busy to do so (such as ice for chill’s leg). WE THANK YOU so much Steve Jamieson.; Now hole 12 on the Premiere {original} course. Hey McGoop, how many clubs are we supposed to go down? As for writing this report – we thank you for your patience. WE had a few technical glitches – all worked out and the bone amounts have all been corrected. It’s over - wahhh! Yes Slammers after 275 events - the 2014 season is done. Now go see the last notable!

Stars
Gator
Gator – DID show up first. He DID suggest that he should win. He DID in fact win. In a foursome that showed the other three all as having a 1-2 record, there was one certainty. Gator came in as fourth seed, upset the three others and ends the season as the year end C champion. He took them by reverse ranking order. His first victim was Stevie Ray 6and4. Previously SRR held an edge 10-1. On the very next hole he shook hands with pepperoni boy. That 4and3 improved his career to 6-15-2 with extra cheese. He completed the upset sweep 3and1 over Bookie, with his par on hole five. Bookie won the day before and still has a one match lead in their head-to-head matches. Gator's next game could be his last in this division. He will remove a 102 next. A score of 91 moves him to B class.
Blue
Blue - He had dinner reservations the night before. They were too early to be able to play Falcon Ridge. A big risk! When the changed venue cost us a couple of Senior competitors, Blue backed in. He did so without using any reverse alarms. He defeated PapaMalone, Lucky and Spud (both upsets) to become the 2014 Tour Senior champion. beep ... beep ... beep ... beep ... beep!
chill
chill injury update - Those of you at the event saw her being helped into and out of the nineteenth. MUCH CONCERN! Well the injury is torn quadriceps tendon. It is severed from the patella {knee cap}. Operation to re-attach and repair will be performed earliest at 9 p.m. Monday evening if there are no other emergencies. She is planning serious rehab to be ready for the Cuba trip. And she adds this "Bummer is I won't be able to drive for 6-8 weeks. I can be chauffeured though, like to the Slammies. I "will" be there. Crutches and full leg brace and a smile on my face!" Her Brother-in-law gets to add one of the last quotables(and a bit of prose), and chill added the FINAL ONE. Now the reason for her stardom ... chill first 'fell'ed J$ 5and4, to even their career at 2-2-1 {she also beat him yesterday}, and picked the right time to win. As she has done 75% of the time during their 48 match career, chill gave the 'slip' to Juice 3and2 this time. Her final 'slue-foot' was over FingZ, on their 18th hole (#8), She needed to close with two pars for the win, 3-0 and her second different divisional championship in three years, she was the 2012 Ladies champion.
Onsite Coordinator
  • Grumpy
Stats
  • Attendance: 43
  • Scoring Average: 89
  • Birdie Average: 0.42
  • Course Rating: 9.5
  • Best aspects of course: Open course - no snow and incredible November conditions
Kids
  • The Kids earned $36
Event Fees
  • ST Member: $35
  • EG Member: $30
  • EG Unl. Member: $25

UPSETS DEFENCES
Challenger Defender Hole Challenger Defender Hole
McGoop [O2] Chef [O1] 11 Bubba [C5] Ticklar [A39] 12
Gator [B8] PizzaMan [A7] 14 Papa Malone [C8] Blue [A11] 12
Ticklar [A39] T-bird [A16] 14 Papa Malone [C8] Spud [A9] 12
Woodsy [A13] Chef [O1] 15 Grumpy [D2] AngryBird [C4] 12
AngryBird [C4] BearCat [B15] 15 Malone [O3] McGoop [O2] 13
Steel Crazy (r) [B21] Irons [A17] 15 Potter [C1] Bobo [B32] 13
Ticklar [A39] Rulz [A22] 16 Lucky [B6] Spud [A9] 14
Dracula [A3] Crenshaw [A2] 16 Lucky [B6] Blue [A11] 14
Malone [O3] Chef [O1] 16 Papa Malone [C8] Lucky [B6] 14
Woodsy [A13] Malone [O3] 16 Bubba [C5] Rulz [A22] 14
Dr. Pepper (r) [B16] IronMaiden [B1] 16 Woodsy [A13] McGoop [O2] 14
chill [B2] Juice [A1] 17 Biscuit Oshumka [C9] Bobo [B32] 14
Bookie [C3] PizzaMan [A7] 17 J-Money [B4] chill [B2] 14
FingZ (r) [B3] Juice [A1] 18 Lulu (r) [D6] Shteeme Boy (r) [A30] 14
J-Money [B4] Juice [A1] 18 ToothFairy [B31] Dr. Pepper (r) [B16] 14
Rulz [A22] T-bird [A16] 18 Stevie Ray [C2] Gator [B8] 15
Blue [A11] Spud [A9] 18 Grumpy [D2] Gazzif [D1] 15
SunShine [B40] Shteeme Boy (r) [A30] 15
Potter [C1] Tesla (r) [B39] 15
Biscuit Oshumka [C9] Tesla (r) [B39] 15
Stevie Ray [C2] PizzaMan [A7] 16
pointZero [A5] Sunny [B5] 16
pointZero [A5] Dracula [A3] 16
Pearls [C7] Shteeme Boy (r) [A30] 16
Gru [B7] Irons [A17] 16
Bookie [C3] Gator [B8] 17
pointZero [A5] Crenshaw [A2] 17
ToothFairy [B31] IronMaiden [B1] 17
Bubba [C5] T-bird [A16] 17
FingZ (r) [B3] chill [B2] 17
Lulu (r) [D6] Pearls [C7] 17
SunShine [B40] Pearls [C7] 17
Gru [B7] Fowler [O8] 17
Bookie [C3] Stevie Ray [C2] 18
Crenshaw [A2] Sunny [B5] 18
Dracula [A3] Sunny [B5] 18
Gazzif [D1] BearCat [B15] 18
Grumpy [D2] BearCat [B15] 18
Lulu (r) [D6] SunShine [B40] 18
Biscuit Oshumka [C9] Potter [C1] 18
Irons [A17] Fowler [O8] 18
Gazzif [D1] AngryBird [C4] 18
Steel Crazy (r) [B21] Gru [B7] 18
Tesla (r) [B39] Bobo [B32] 18
Steel Crazy (r) [B21] Fowler [O8] 18
J-Money [B4] FingZ (r) [B3] 18

INDIVIDUAL PLAYER STATS
Slammer Score Birds Eagles Dogs Bones Skins Bones Record Points
McGoop 72 5 0 0 0 2 100 3-0-0 6
Ticklar 80 0 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
Blue 83 1 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
chill 84 0 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
Fowler 85 1 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
Gator 86 0 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
Bobo 91 0 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
Shteeme Boy (r) 91 0 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
AngryBird 92 0 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
Dracula 86 1 0 2 106 0 0 2-0-1 5
Tesla (r) 94 0 0 1 53 0 0 2-1-0 4
Woodsy 79 2 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
Dr. Pepper (r) 81 1 0 0 0 0 0 2-0-0 4
Rulz 84 0 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
FingZ (r) 85 1 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
Spud 86 0 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
Sunny 86 1 0 0 0 0 0 1-0-2 4
Pearls 96 0 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
Crenshaw 86 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-1-1 3
Steel Crazy (r) 88 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-1-1 3
Gazzif 96 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-1-1 3
Malone 83 1 0 0 0 1 50 1-2-0 2
Irons 89 2 0 0 0 1 50 1-2-0 2
IronMaiden 84 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-1-0 2
J-Money 88 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
T-bird 88 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
PizzaMan 89 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Bookie 91 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Lucky 91 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
BearCat 94 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-1-2 2
Stevie Ray 94 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
SunShine 98 1 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Potter 99 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Gru 91 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-1 1
Grumpy 98 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-1 1
Bubba 93 0 0 1 53 0 0 0-3-0 0
Chef 86 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0
ToothFairy 87 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-0 0
Juice 89 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0
pointZero 90 1 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0
Biscuit Oshumka 99 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0
Papa Malone 101 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0
Lulu (r) 104 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0

SKINS
HOLE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 OUT 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 IN TOTAL SKINS
PAR 4 4 3 5 4 5 3 4 4 36 4 4 3 4 3 4 5 4 5 36 72
McGoop 5 5 3 4 4 4 4 4 4 37 3 3 3 4 4 5 4 4 5 35 72 2
Malone 4 4 4 5 5 5 4 4 5 40 6 4 5 5 5 5 5 4 4 43 83 1
Irons 5 5 3 5 4 6 4 4 6 42 4 7 4 6 5 6 4 3 8 47 89 1
Woodsy 4 4 4 5 5 4 4 4 5 39 4 4 3 6 5 5 4 4 5 40 79 0
Ticklar 4 5 4 5 4 5 3 5 4 39 4 5 5 4 4 4 5 5 5 41 80 0
Dr. Pepper (r) 4 4 3 4 4 5 3 4 5 36 6 5 4 4 4 5 6 6 5 45 81 0
Blue 5 5 3 4 5 5 4 4 4 39 5 5 3 6 4 4 7 5 5 44 83 0
Rulz 5 5 4 5 4 5 4 4 5 41 5 5 3 7 3 5 6 4 5 43 84 0
IronMaiden 4 5 3 5 5 5 3 4 5 39 6 5 3 4 4 6 7 4 6 45 84 0
chill 4 4 3 5 5 6 3 4 4 38 7 4 5 5 4 6 5 4 6 46 84 0
FingZ (r) 5 6 3 4 5 5 4 4 5 41 4 6 3 5 6 5 5 5 5 44 85 0
Fowler 5 6 4 5 6 5 4 5 5 45 5 5 3 5 4 5 4 4 5 40 85 0
Chef 5 5 4 6 5 5 4 5 5 44 4 4 3 6 4 5 6 4 6 42 86 0
Sunny 4 5 4 5 5 6 4 4 5 42 5 6 5 7 3 5 4 4 5 44 86 0
Dracula 5 4 4 6 6 5 3 4 5 42 4 7 3 6 2 5 5 5 7 44 86 0
Spud 5 5 4 6 4 5 4 5 4 42 4 4 6 5 4 5 5 5 6 44 86 0
Crenshaw 5 4 4 6 6 5 4 4 5 43 5 5 5 5 3 5 6 4 5 43 86 0
Gator 4 5 4 8 4 6 4 5 4 44 4 5 4 5 3 5 5 5 6 42 86 0
ToothFairy 6 5 3 6 4 6 3 4 5 42 6 4 4 5 5 5 5 5 6 45 87 0
T-bird 5 4 3 6 5 8 4 4 5 44 6 5 5 5 4 4 5 4 6 44 88 0
J-Money 4 4 4 6 5 5 3 5 5 41 6 4 6 6 5 4 6 5 5 47 88 0
Steel Crazy (r) 4 5 5 5 5 6 3 4 5 42 6 4 3 6 4 5 7 5 6 46 88 0
PizzaMan 5 5 4 6 4 7 4 6 4 45 5 6 3 6 4 5 5 5 5 44 89 0
Juice 4 5 3 6 4 6 3 5 5 41 6 5 4 4 4 6 7 5 7 48 89 0
pointZero 5 5 5 6 6 4 4 4 5 44 6 4 5 4 4 5 8 4 6 46 90 0
Bookie 6 6 3 6 6 6 3 5 4 45 5 4 5 5 3 5 7 5 7 46 91 0
Shteeme Boy (r) 5 6 4 6 5 5 3 6 5 45 6 4 6 5 4 5 5 5 6 46 91 0
Lucky 7 5 3 6 5 5 4 6 6 47 5 5 4 5 5 5 5 5 5 44 91 0
Bobo 5 5 3 6 6 5 5 4 5 44 5 5 3 6 4 6 7 5 6 47 91 0
Gru 4 6 4 7 4 7 5 4 5 46 5 4 5 6 3 6 6 5 5 45 91 0
AngryBird 4 4 3 6 4 6 3 6 5 41 6 4 4 8 4 6 8 5 6 51 92 0
Bubba 6 6 4 7 5 6 3 5 4 46 5 7 5 4 3 6 6 5 6 47 93 0
Stevie Ray 5 6 4 5 5 5 4 4 5 43 6 4 5 5 7 7 6 5 6 51 94 0
BearCat 4 7 3 8 7 7 4 6 4 50 4 4 5 4 5 6 6 5 5 44 94 0
Tesla (r) 5 5 3 6 6 6 3 5 6 45 5 5 7 5 4 5 6 5 7 49 94 0
SunShine 6 5 5 7 6 7 4 6 4 50 5 6 5 6 2 6 6 6 6 48 98 0
Grumpy 4 5 5 6 5 7 4 6 6 48 6 5 4 8 4 6 5 5 7 50 98 0
Potter 5 6 4 6 6 6 4 5 6 48 5 6 6 6 4 6 7 5 6 51 99 0
Biscuit Oshumka 4 5 5 7 5 6 4 5 6 47 6 6 4 6 5 8 5 5 7 52 99 0
Papa Malone 5 6 3 6 6 6 5 8 6 51 5 5 6 5 5 6 7 4 7 50 101 0
TOTAL 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 1 0 0 0 0 0 1 1 4
Legend E Eagle or Better B Birdie P Par G Bogey or Greater C Cut-off birdie

PLAYER MATCHES
HOLE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18
AS 1U 1U 1U 1U 2U 3U 4U 4U 5U 6U - - - -
5 5 3 4 4 4 4 4 4 3 3 3 4 4 - - - -
4 4 4 5 5 4 4 4 5 4 4 3 6 5 - - - -
1U 2U 1U AS - - - -
RESULT: McGoop wins 6 and 4 Start match at hole:
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