The Slammer Tour: Event Summary

Notables

When you were reading about the third star - it was mentioned that there were only five 2s on the 48 scorecards handed in today. That was with a field full of Open and A players. Well on the first par three (#3) Stevie Ray and Billiards cut each other off with their father/son birds. The last par three (16), father and son pair Chubs and F6Noob also cut each other off. Both the Super Senior dads won the dogs. Another Super Senior Rexall was the only other 2 handed in today.
The most embarrassing moment of my Slammer career. We had a seldom seen Slammer at today's event, and he was also our Doggie Master. Well after the round when trying to figure out the winners, there was a ball that he couldn't decipher. It contained the letters WIR! Well you know him as Billiards, but his non-Slammer name is Wiliam Ignatius Ryan. The doggie Master was WIR's own son Rulz. Rulz did collect and hand out the Culligan bones to our five different winners. See the list below there, on the right. Get over it Rulz, Juice plans on beating you all year by inches!
My perennial vote for the Preston Cup goes to Iron Maiden. And why? should be obvious - she is ever-present and always involved. Today not only did she distribute all of those Evolution Physio skins bones, but she also had to enter all of the scores - TWICE. When we have a large event - there is an advantage to enter right on site, but when timed out - we have to start all over, and she did Your meal was hot and I am willing to bet that she didnt get a hot meal. THANK YOU MAIDEN!
We all know that scores don't matter on the Tour. However today there were nine 80s or better! What a field! Part of the fun on the Slammer Tour is when we award the skins and dogs. With all of the Open and A players, have a closer look and see that BogeyMan was another D classer that won a dog. Gaziff and Grumpy were a pair of D's to win a skin.
Anybody find a wedge? Taylor Made RH Advance wedge. It is Wilford's. Please contact him at wilford@slammertour.com.
Before you think that we all putted terribly - when you look at the amount the Make-A-Wish foundation earned over there on the right - realize that forty of it came when people bought those 'envelopes' at the end of the dinner.
DID YOU SEE THOSE NEW BELTS? Who wants one? Go to the Slammer Gear page to order.

Quotables

"It's been almost two years since my last Slammer event. It will be nice to once again put money in someone's pockets." "Good to have you back Wilford, by the way there is plenty of room for bones in my pocket."
"His nickname is Ace, and he wants strokes?"
"Ladies don't do bushes!"
"There goes a $10 ball!"
"YA BABY! I nutted that one."
"It's not perfect, but it is pretty perfect."
"OH Cart Girl!"
"All of these rules. I feel like I am at a strip club!"
"Did you yell FORE?" "No! the fore should be good for the whole foursome."
"Where is Granpa?" "Granpa had to leave for a nap!"
"Try to get my ticket back. It is in my pants."
"I am having fun. I don't know why you put me with these people."
"I am loaded!" "What are you drinking?" "This is a Woody's." "Is it your first?" "No, I have been having a Woody all day."
"Rulz could pass for a cart girl."
"Then there was one."
"NO! You can't play through."

Sat May 18, 2013

Summary
Stop the complaining! The summer weather officially arrived with the annual Executive Golf Opener. If you were there, you heard our Assistant Commissioner vow that a name change to this event was imminent. We have the weather, the fantastic hosts that are the Casselview staff, and many MANY prizes to be had. We would like to extend a warm welcome to the six Slammers playing their inaugural event. They are: Ace, NikeMom, PersonalityPlus, Special K, Chris Chong {I kept calling him Cheech}, and Sandra Harvey {Green Genie?}. Also ZeeGal (Mrs ZeeMan) and Mrs Dracula played in a Slammer group.

Stars
	Woodsy
	The Tour has a new number one. Woodsy upset Chef 2 and 1. That match brings their career to an even 7-7-2 record. Did you know that this is the third straight win for Woodsy over Chef? Also this was only Chef�s second loss this season and first since the first event. Both to Woodsy! Along the way, Woodsy added a birdie on his first hole, to move closer to his career birdie average. He also kept his record flawless against Sunny (6-0) and Rulz (4-0), defeating them both 5 and 4. For such a great day on the course, he won a Slammer Tour belt, a twosome to Canadian, A bucket of balls at Karter's Korners, Wigwam socks, and a Slammer Tour Shirt.
	ShortStack
	ShortStack's prize as second star consists of a twosome to Canadian and an ST shirt. What for? He went 3-0 today. He is a C classer! He shook hands with Inch {who has the better scoring median}, after their 13th (#8), thus avenging a draw in their previous match. He hung in there, against "B" classer Shorts, defeating him in their first ever match, and this upset vaulted him 11 steps higher on the ladder. His bogey on the last hole was the winner. His most impressive match was against the "A" classer GaspeBoy, who he defeated 2 and 1. Once again ShortStack tied his Slammer Tour best score. Note - this group started on hole 14, so if you look below and see different results - this is why.
	Rexall (We Remember)
	Rexall, his only purpose on Tour is NOT to get more hugs than Billiards, even IF it does look like it. The two of them in the same group today, no woman was safe! Then again - none of them complained! Rexall was the only Slammer to record a two {see the fun page / week In review that is about to come out and the note about his 2s}, in this event that it wasn't cut off by a father/son. He is one of the nine Slammers who went 3-0 today. Two are mentioned above and, he narrowly beat out KaDaver who's wins were all successful defences. I didn't realize at the time - and granted the stardom on the upset over Stevie Ray, moving Rexall up some rungs. What I realized afterwards? This was their 12th match and SRR is still yet to have a victory. For that effort Rexall also gets the shirt, bucket of balls and a pair of Wigwam socks.

Onsite Coordinator

Grumpy

Stats

Attendance: 48
Scoring Average: 93
Birdie Average: 0.48
Course Rating: 8.5
Best aspects of course: Greens ... GREENS! and the people!

Kids

The Kids earned $84

Event Fees

ST Member: $100
EG Member: $90
EG Unl. Member: $80

UPSETS			DEFENCES
Challenger	Defender	Hole	Challenger	Defender	Hole
Taxman [D30]	Granpa [D13]	10	TryGuy [D124]	Pukey J [B4]	10
PokerFace [B58]	SunShine [B36]	12	Granpa [D13]	Pukey J [B4]	10
Special K (r) [Unr]	Personality Plus (r) [Unr]	12	TryGuy [D124]	Taxman [D30]	11
Rexall (We Remember) [C6]	Stevie Ray [C3]	15	Gazzif [D6]	PokerFace [B58]	12
IronMaiden [B17]	PizzaMan [A27]	15	Chris Chong (r) [Unr]	Chubs [A29]	12
TryGuy [D124]	Granpa [D13]	15	Ace (r) [Unr]	Chubs [A29]	12
Special K (r) [Unr]	Green Genie (r) [Unr]	15	Personality Plus (r) [Unr]	NikeMom (r) [Unr]	12
Wilford [C39]	Sutty [C11]	16	Billiards [C35]	Rexall (We Remember) [C6]	13
Guinness [D17]	Grumpy [D3]	16	Inch [B10]	ShortStack [A21]	13
Woodsy [A12]	Chef [O1]	17	Chris Chong (r) [Unr]	F6Noob (r) [A24]	13
Precious [C43]	SunShine [B36]	17	Green Genie (r) [Unr]	NikeMom (r) [Unr]	13
Fodder [A17]	Old Spice [A10]	18	Rulz [A34]	Chef [O1]	14
			BogeyMan (r) [C184]	Papa Malone [C10]	14
			Inch [B10]	Gaspeboy (r) [O24]	14
			Gazzif [D6]	Precious [C43]	14
			Rulz [A34]	Woodsy [A12]	14
			Sunny [B22]	Woodsy [A12]	14
			Precious [C43]	PokerFace [B58]	14
			Taxman [D30]	Pukey J [B4]	14
			Ace (r) [Unr]	F6Noob (r) [A24]	14
			Personality Plus (r) [Unr]	Green Genie (r) [Unr]	14
			Chris Chong (r) [Unr]	Ace (r) [Unr]	14
			Sunny [B22]	Chef [O1]	15
			Guinness [D17]	Papa Malone [C10]	15
			Gazzif [D6]	SunShine [B36]	15
			HELFM [B60]	Rexall (We Remember) [C6]	15
			ZeeMan [C76]	Dracula [A26]	15
			Blue [A20]	Fodder [A17]	15
			Billiards [C35]	HELFM [B60]	16
			Billiards [C35]	Stevie Ray [C3]	16
			Rulz [A34]	Sunny [B22]	16
			Grumpy [D3]	Papa Malone [C10]	16
			Sutty [C11]	BearCat [B27]	16
			Old Spice [A10]	KaDaver [A7]	16
			Blue [A20]	KaDaver [A7]	16
			Shorts [B3]	Gaspeboy (r) [O24]	16
			PizzaMan [A27]	Pouf [A16]	16
			HELFM [B60]	Stevie Ray [C3]	17
			PizzaMan [A27]	Juice [A23]	17
			Blue [A20]	Old Spice [A10]	17
			IronMaiden [B17]	Pouf [A16]	17
			Chubs [A29]	F6Noob (r) [A24]	17
			IronMaiden [B17]	Juice [A23]	18
			Turtle [B61]	BearCat [B27]	18
			Wilford [C39]	BearCat [B27]	18
			Sutty [C11]	Turtle [B61]	18
			BogeyMan (r) [C184]	Grumpy [D3]	18
			Turtle [B61]	Wilford [C39]	18
			Fodder [A17]	KaDaver [A7]	18
			Guinness [D17]	BogeyMan (r) [C184]	18
			Shorts [B3]	ShortStack [A21]	18
			Inch [B10]	Shorts [B3]	18
			Juice [A23]	Pouf [A16]	18
			Gaspeboy (r) [O24]	ShortStack [A21]	18
			Special K (r) [Unr]	NikeMom (r) [Unr]	18

INDIVIDUAL PLAYER STATS
Slammer	Score	Birds	Eagles	Dogs	Bones	Skins	Bones	Record	Points
KaDaver	75	3	0	0	0	2	60	3-0-0	6
Rexall (We Remember)	80	1	0	0	0	1	30	3-0-0	6
PokerFace	87	1	0	0	0	1	30	3-0-0	6
Woodsy	74	1	0	0	0	0	0	3-0-0	6
F6Noob (r)	75	2	0	0	0	0	0	3-0-0	6
Pukey J	75	1	0	0	0	0	0	3-0-0	6
ShortStack	83	0	0	0	0	0	0	3-0-0	6
Pouf	85	0	0	0	0	0	0	3-0-0	6
Papa Malone	97	0	0	0	0	0	0	3-0-0	6
Wilford	90	0	0	0	0	0	0	2-0-1	5
Special K (r)	106	0	0	0	0	0	0	2-0-1	5
NikeMom (r)	107	0	0	0	0	0	0	2-0-1	5
Chubs	78	1	0	1	48	0	0	2-1-0	4
Gaspeboy (r)	81	1	0	1	48	0	0	2-1-0	4
Juice	88	2	0	1	48	0	0	2-1-0	4
Chef	76	1	0	0	0	0	0	2-1-0	4
Fodder	77	1	0	0	0	0	0	2-1-0	4
Stevie Ray	90	1	0	0	0	0	0	2-1-0	4
BearCat	91	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-0-2	4
Taxman	92	0	0	0	0	0	0	2-1-0	4
Precious	93	0	0	0	0	0	0	2-1-0	4
BogeyMan (r)	104	0	0	1	48	0	0	1-1-1	3
Turtle	89	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-1-1	3
Old Spice	81	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
Dracula	82	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-0-0	2
Sunny	84	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
Ace (r)	85	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
IronMaiden	90	1	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
HELFM	94	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
SunShine	99	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
Guinness	105	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
TryGuy	117	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
Green Genie (r)	122	0	0	0	0	0	0	1-2-0	2
Grumpy	104	1	0	0	0	1	30	0-2-1	1
Shorts	87	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-2-1	1
Inch	89	1	0	0	0	0	0	0-2-1	1
Billiards	94	1	0	1	48	0	0	0-3-0	0
Gazzif	106	1	0	0	0	1	30	0-3-0	0
Blue	80	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-3-0	0
ZeeMan	90	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-1-0	0
PizzaMan	91	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-3-0	0
Rulz	91	2	0	0	0	0	0	0-3-0	0
Sutty	94	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-3-0	0
Chris Chong (r)	98	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-3-0	0
ZeeGal (r)	101	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-0-0	0
Non-Slammer #1	107	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-0-0	0
Granpa	123	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-3-0	0
Personality Plus (r)	136	0	0	0	0	0	0	0-3-0	0

SKINS
HOLE	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	OUT	10	11	12	13	14	15	16	17	18	IN	TOTAL	SKINS
PAR	5	4	3	4	3	5	3	4	5	36	4	4	5	4	3	4	3	4	4	35	71
KaDaver	5	3	3	4	4	6	4	4	6	39	5	4	7	4	3	3	3	4	3	36	75	2
Rexall (We Remember)	5	4	3	4	3	6	2	5	7	39	4	4	6	5	5	4	3	5	5	41	80	1
PokerFace	5	4	4	3	3	8	4	5	5	41	5	5	5	5	4	5	7	6	4	46	87	1
Grumpy	8	5	5	8	5	5	4	6	8	54	5	8	4	5	6	6	6	4	6	50	104	1
Gazzif	7	5	6	4	5	4	3	6	7	47	5	8	6	8	8	7	5	6	6	59	106	1
Woodsy	4	4	3	4	3	6	3	4	5	36	4	4	5	6	3	5	3	4	4	38	74	0
F6Noob (r)	4	4	3	4	3	5	4	5	6	38	4	4	6	4	4	5	2	4	4	37	75	0
Pukey J	5	5	3	4	4	5	3	4	5	38	5	4	5	3	3	4	4	5	4	37	75	0
Chef	5	3	3	4	3	5	4	4	5	36	4	5	6	4	5	4	4	4	4	40	76	0
Fodder	6	4	4	4	4	5	4	6	5	42	4	4	5	4	3	4	4	3	4	35	77	0
Chubs	5	4	3	4	4	6	3	4	5	38	4	5	5	5	4	5	2	5	5	40	78	0
Blue	5	5	4	4	4	6	4	4	6	42	5	4	5	5	3	5	3	4	4	38	80	0
Gaspeboy (r)	5	4	3	4	3	7	4	5	5	40	3	5	6	4	5	5	4	5	4	41	81	0
Old Spice	5	4	3	4	4	5	3	4	5	37	6	4	8	4	4	5	4	4	5	44	81	0
Dracula	5	6	4	5	3	6	3	4	5	41	4	5	6	4	5	4	4	4	5	41	82	0
ShortStack	7	4	3	5	3	6	3	5	5	41	6	4	5	5	4	6	4	4	4	42	83	0
Sunny	7	5	3	5	3	5	4	4	6	42	4	6	5	5	4	6	4	4	4	42	84	0
Ace (r)	6	4	4	5	5	6	3	5	6	44	4	5	6	4	4	4	5	4	5	41	85	0
Pouf	5	5	4	4	3	5	3	4	8	41	4	6	8	4	3	5	4	5	5	44	85	0
Shorts	6	4	3	4	5	7	3	5	8	45	5	5	6	6	3	5	4	4	4	42	87	0
Juice	4	4	6	4	4	6	3	4	8	43	5	5	8	4	5	6	3	3	6	45	88	0
Turtle	5	5	3	5	3	7	5	6	5	44	5	6	6	6	3	5	5	5	4	45	89	0
Inch	5	4	4	6	4	7	4	6	6	46	3	5	5	6	6	4	4	4	6	43	89	0
Wilford	6	4	3	5	4	6	4	5	7	44	7	5	6	7	3	4	3	7	4	46	90	0
ZeeMan	5	5	3	7	3	7	3	6	6	45	5	6	7	4	4	5	3	5	6	45	90	0
Stevie Ray	7	5	2	6	3	6	4	4	6	43	5	5	6	7	4	5	4	6	5	47	90	0
Rulz	8	3	4	4	3	6	3	4	7	42	5	7	6	3	6	5	4	8	5	49	91	0
BearCat	6	4	4	5	3	5	4	5	7	43	6	5	6	5	4	5	4	6	7	48	91	0
PizzaMan	7	5	3	6	5	6	3	4	6	45	4	6	6	6	4	5	5	4	6	46	91	0
Taxman	6	4	3	8	3	6	4	6	5	45	5	5	5	7	5	6	4	4	6	47	92	0
Billiards	6	6	2	7	3	7	4	5	7	47	5	4	7	6	6	4	5	5	5	47	94	0
Sutty	6	4	4	6	4	5	4	5	8	46	5	6	5	5	4	6	4	7	6	48	94	0
HELFM	6	5	6	4	4	6	3	5	5	44	8	6	5	4	5	6	4	7	5	50	94	0
Papa Malone	7	5	4	5	3	7	4	5	8	48	6	6	5	5	3	7	3	6	8	49	97	0
Guinness	8	5	4	6	3	7	3	6	8	50	5	6	6	6	5	8	4	7	8	55	105	0
Granpa	8	8	8	8	8	8	8	8	8	72	7	6	5	6	4	8	4	5	6	51	123	0
TOTAL	0	0	0	1	0	1	1	0	0		0	0	1	0	0	1	0	0	1			6
Legend	E	Eagle or Better						B	Birdie		P	Par		G	Bogey or Greater					C	Cut-off birdie

PLAYER MATCHES
HOLE	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	12	13	14	15	16	17	18
	1U	AS	1U	1U	1U	1U	1U	1U	2U	3U	4U	5U	4U	5U	-	-	-	-
	4	4	3	4	3	6	3	4	5	4	4	5	6	3	-	-	-	-
	8	3	4	4	3	6	3	4	7	5	7	6	3	6	-	-	-	-
		AS													-	-	-	-
RESULT: Woodsy wins 5 and 4 Start match at hole:

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